March 20, 2014

Ant #251. CV.

I got a crazy idea, but I think it's brilliant!

Look! What if people before starting relationships would exchange rings special CVs where they described all their past experience?

Like this!

Mr. N.Sex: male.Date of birth: 12 june 1988. 
Relationship experience: 
March 2010 - February 2014.In relationship with Mrs. X.- Living together.- Sharing budget.- Adopting a dog.
June 2008 - November 2009.In relationship with Mr. O.- First gay experience.- Surviving coming-out.
January 2008 - May 2008.In relationship with Mrs. P.- Long distance love.
Personal skills:- Don't cheat.- Sex addict.- Cat allergic.
Recommendations:Mrs. X: +1 (485) xxx-xxxx 
It would be so f*cking amazing!!! ^_^

Ant #250. Danger! High voltage!

I live in a country where everybody touches and kisses. Everybody!!!
Even straight men do that welcoming each other.

So I try to be nice and do what people are used to do, but every time someone kisses me or even touches me, I feel like I get an electrical shock. Every single piece of my body protests!

Of course, I don't feel so when someone I love is touching me, in this case I feel warm.
But it's really hard to me to accept these intimate (yes, intimate) contacts even from my close friends.

Well, there are always exceptions! No details! ;-)

March 13, 2014

Ant #249. Fathers and Sons

Today I've had a very bad conversation with my dad.

We were arguing about situation in Ukraine, all the aspects of a problem. He started telling me historical "facts" that USSR saved the half of Europe from Hitler and they must be grateful. I added that we also occupied them, so I doubt they should be grateful.

He watches russian TV and believes everything they say. He said that Bandera (historical ukrainian person) was pro-Hitler. I disagreed coz he was just anti-Stalin, that's it. I also said that Bandera was in a german prison (1941-1944) and couldn't participate the war, and this is a fact, everyone who read history knows it. He said it's a lie coz he saw on a TV a few videos where Bandera killed russians (whaaaaaat?).
I started laughing, I just couldn't keep arguing using facts against fiction and russian bullshit propaganda.
Then he started telling me the same crap that all russians tell to their kids, that evil America dreams to destroy us and turn us into slaves! (*facepalm*).
I said, "Yeah, that's why we have NATO military base in Ulianovsk (the city near Moscow)!"

He said I'm a traitor of my homeland and dropped the call.


March 8, 2014

Ant #248. Time Machine.

If I had a Time Machine, I would travel into the future to see how many people will be upset 
when I die. 
Don't ask me why.

Ant #247. International Women's Day.

The 8th of march is known as International Women's Day, the holiday created by 2 women not so many years ago and kinda despised by feminists all over the world.


Because it's stupid to celebrate your gender. It's like celebrating your hair color, stupid and ridiculous.

Also I find it unfair that women have their own idiotic holiday, but men don't!
I want our own idiotic day, so I can laugh twice a year, not only once like now.

That's it!
Thanx for attention and Happy International Women's Day!

March 6, 2014

Ant #246. Opposite.

Good - bad.
Saint - sinner.
Big - small.
Light - dark.
Life - death.
Love - ...

What is the opposite of love actually?
Hate? Maybe...
But if think about the best and the worst things in a life, love is definitely the best, but is hate really the worst? At least it's an emotion. The worst thing is when there are no emotions at all.

The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference.