Ant #328. Target audience.

I have many politically and socially active friends and I really respect them.
They post on social networks, talk to people, organize conferences etc and I respect it too.

The problem is... It's all pointless because the target audience is being chosen wrong.

Let me explain.
If you're a gay rights fighter, all your facebook friends are probably gays or gay friendly people. Homophobes don't go to LGBT conferences so you'll never be able to change their opinions.

The same with racism. Do you have any neo-nazi friends? I don't. All my friends are pretty tolerant and respecting other people.

Or my lovely socialistic friends. All the people who read you are already your "comrades", they don't need to be convinced in anything.

Identify your target audience or don't waste your time.

Ant #324. Kids.

All of my friends probably heard from me that I hate kids. And of course when I say this, I don't mean it.

When I was 6 years old, my sister bore a daughter. But I didn't become her uncle, instead I became her father. My sister got divorced and never had any support from ex husband. She worked a lot, so did our parents, so I was with my niece 24/7. I did all those things that fathers always do, while I was a kid myself.

It was a hard time for me, since that moment I used to say I hate kids and I don't want to have my own one coz I already have one (my niece), but of course it's not true! In Russia we say that "kids are flowers of a life". I cannot say any better!

Why am I saying all these?

I've just known that my lovely friend, amazing argentinian girl that I once met in Tel Aviv, has got a second child, a beautiful boy called Noam. And I'm so happy for her that I don't even have proper words to describe my excitement! She's definitely one of the greatest moms on Earth and the boy was very lucky to be born by her.

OMG! I'm so emotional right now! ^_^

Ant #321. HIV+ people.

I have a friend (in Moscow) who is HIV positive. He doesn't know that I know it, but I know (don't ask me how).

I saw this video and I remembered about him. I remembered how he never let me to hug him, how he never let me to drink from his cup, how he refused to sleep at my home because he thought he had to force me to clean the sheets after him and didn't know how.

I left Russia more than 2 years ago, but he never opened up to me or to any of our friends. And I understand why. For many HIV+ people it's even more difficult than for gays to come out from closet. There are so many prejudges in a society about this desease.

I feel sorry that I couldn't tell him some words of support... I didn't want him to feel scared or uncomfortable. If he wanted to keep it in secret, I had to respect his decision.

I just wanna tell anybody who has HIV+ friends. They aren't leprous. They are still the same people that you once knew!

Ant #313. Left - Right.

It's not about socks or driver license exam.
This time I wanna talk about serious and very important things to me...

A small pretty girl gave me a flyer. I took it. There was a logo of pro-government party. I gave it back. "No fucking way I vote for left-wing politicians."
I kept walking... and thinking that sometimes it's hard to stand people with opposite political views. Almost all of my friends in Russia (those who I chose, not those who I had in my school or university) are liberal, respect freedom and self-responsibility, believe in a power of market and think that everyone gets what he/she deserves. So do I! These views are usually called right-wing.

The problem is that since I moved to Argentina, which is absolutely socialistic country, I'm in minority. A very few people share my views. All the rest think that right-wing politicians equal to corrupted politicians. They call a fascist everyone who says he doesn't care of lazy people who never worked in their lives and have always lived for the money that the government gives them (taxpayers actually, not the government).

It's like a gulf between us. We'll never agree.

Oh, and I'd never date a socialist )))))

Ant #312. April Fools Day.

Every year I make the same joke about getting into relationship and every year the drama starts!
No details because I don't wanna shade anybody, but trust me I pissed myself with laughter at some people ))))))


I wanna say a big thanx to my dear friend Lu-Lu who had balls and wasn't ashamed to participate!

Here he is! 
My one day boyfriend! >>>

Follow him on Instagram!

https://instagram.com/luenletras/

He's very cute and such a sweetheart! <3 

And to all of you...

Happy April Fools Day! ;-)

Ant #305. First impression.

"When you meet a person for a first time, try to do your best, because you never get  a second change to make a first impression!"

That's what my professor of marketing  told me when I was in university.
Smart, isn't it?

I'd like to meet my clone to see what impression I make.
I hope it's not that bad.

Ant #302. Party hard.

Shortly...

We had to call to ambulance last night because one guy overdrank!
That's what I call a good party) LOL )))

P.S. I've been told "Brindo por y con tu leche!"
Those who speak spanish know that it's totally gross! Hahahahaaaa))))

 

Ant #298. Good-bye 2014.

What can I say?
This year has been horrible as hell. Not the worst in my life, but still...

Ok ok, step by step... )))

It's been full of events, ups and downs, stories, bad and good things in almost all the possible sides of a human being's life.

And the most disgusting one is that my country (where I was born) attacked another one, occupied a part of its territory and started a real war with thousands of killed people now on both sides. This situation nearly ruined my relationship with family, especially with my dad who has been a military all his life and sees a greatness of our country in being assholes. It also affected all our incomings, but I would give all my money just to stop this fucking war. Probably it's the very first time in my life when I feel ashamed for being russian. I know I'm not responsible for this crap, I was always against Putin and his corrupted government, I went to all the demonstrations, I never voted for him or his party, but I allowed him to become a president, I didn't try well to convince people and show them who he really is. So I guess I AM responsible too and this feeling is killing me from the inside.

Well, but in this year there also were some positive moments. If 2013 was heartbreaking, than 2014 has been heartrecovering! ))) No details this time, just wanna say that I learnt once again how to love and I think this is the best thing that happened to me in years. I found out that I'm so full of love, passion, warmness, caring, more than ever! I'm not afraid of my feelings any longer and I'm totally happy!

Like in the song... "Through the darkness somehow I survived. Tough love... I knew it from the start, deep down in the depth of my rebel heart!"



So for those who has been devastated like me in this yeah, I wish the next one to be better, actually it barely can be worse! )))
For those who have been fine (I know some, LOL), I wish you all, lucky bastards, the next one to be even brighter!

Spread the love! <3

Ant #292. Friendzone.

I never talked about "friendzone" coz I never was in this situation, I mean I never was friendzoned.
And this theme is kinda new to me.

We all have been rejected, but it's always pretty clear. You can just go f*ck yourself. But how to react on this 21 century invent, on being "friendzoned"?

Weird, isn't it?

One thing is when one tells another one that they can be great friends.
Another thing is when one keeps pulling and pushing another one, playing with another one's feelings, giving hopes and then destroying them. It's just cruel.

I respect honesty!
Make things clear. Immediately. The more you play, the worse will be the pain.

It hurts just a little when you're being told you're not loved, and it hurts way more when you see the signs that something is possible and then you got your heart broken.

The thing that I don't understand is how those who are being friendzoned can stay in touch with their "lovers", having him so close and so far away at the same time. Face the truth, nothing's gonna happen. Sorry.

Ant #287. Brüderschaft.

To drink "na broodershaft" with someone is to consolidate friendship with a special ceremony when two of participants at the same time drink their glasses, for example with wine, with the hands bound in elbows. Then, most often, kiss. During the process it is necessary to look each other in eyes. From this moment participants are considered as good friends and have to address to each other on "you". Ritual comes from medieval Europe when the similar ceremony served as the proof of good intentions of the audience at a table.

According to another version the tradition to drink "na broodershaft" practiced between lovers. If a  drink of one of lovers was poisoned by another, with a kiss the poison was transferred back to the poisoner. Thus, the kiss served as the proof that drink of any of lovers wasn't poisoned.

On Wikipedia in russian: https://ru.wikipedia.org/wiki/%C1%F0%F3%E4%E5%F0%F8%E0%F4%F2

It doesn't matter if you're a man or a woman, straight or gay, married or single, this russian tradition is for everyone in any combination!
So if you drink "na broodershaft" with someone I strongly recommend you to buy a russian vodka at first!
Have a nice drink!
^_^

Ant #268. Gaydar.

From Wikipedia:

Gaydar (a portmanteau of gay and radar) is a colloquialism referring to the intuitive ability of a person to assess others' sexual orientations as gay, bisexual or heterosexual.

Sounds interesting, right?

Almost all of my gay-friends say they can easily see if someone in front of them is gay or not. I still think it's more based on stereotypes than on inner feelings, but how does it work exactly? I can barely find a gay person in a crowd. Moreover, if I didn't know that my gay-friends are gays, I would definitely think that 99% of them were straight.

By the way, I think that this ability is pretty useful! )))

Ant #266. Challenge accepted.

Yesterday I talked to a friend (female) who is deeply in love with one guy.

She was like "Oh, gosh, sometimes it's so hard to open your heart to someone, it burns inside, but when I'm in front of him I barely can say a word!"
I said "Oh, come on! Where are your balls? Tell him everything you feel and let's see!"

She:
- Are you f*cking insane? I'll die immediately!
Me:
- Don't be a pussy! It's not that hard. Everyone does it and no one died yet. )))
She:
- Do you love someone?
Me:
- Mmmm... Maybe! Why are you asking me?
She:
- Let's make a deal! I open up to him, and you open up to someone you love?!
Me:
- DEAL! >_<

I have 2 more days to do that! Hahahaaaa)))

Ant #265. One week in Russia.

It's been one week since I came to Russia.
June 2nd-6th I was in Moscow, now I'm at my parents home in the small provincial city where I was born.

It is quite useful experience after one year outside the country.

When I was flying to Moscow, I was preparing to feel negativity, to see sad people, I thought that when I get into Domodedovo I will throw up. But when I saw inscriptions on Cyrillics, I started smiling as an idiot and greeting everybody, feeling some looks of disapproval on myself. But I didn't care! Even if I was dying to sleep, I was glad to come back to the hometown (I wasn't born in Moscow, but I consider it as my hometown coz I feel great there). At the airport I was met by a friend, got into his car, and once we left the airport we stuck in a traffic jam. He started screaming at people and showing his middle finger to everyone. I said: "Calm down or someone's gonna kick our asses! ", he took out a gun and said: "No one fucks with us!". I said: "When did you all become that nervous? ", he replied: "It's our life!"

Next 3 days I felt this public aggression even more.  I don't know if something really happened there or it's just me after a year in Argentina.

The city itself I loved a lot! I never noticed earlier what a beautiful city I lived in. Everything in it for me was kinda ordinary, and now when I looked at it with the eyes of a tourist, I was really impressed!

Then I met my friends. Finally we had a heart-to-heart talk. One of my friend who recently was arrested on a demonstration, now prepares documents and goes to Spain. Our mutual friend will join him this fall. Two more guys (gays that live together for many years) now actively looking for a possibility of moving to Germany. I don't know if they cam manage it or not, but I wish them a good luck! Another friend, a girl (one of my best friends) wants to try to enter the university in Stockholm, she says that if it won't happen, she will come to Buenos Aires to me.

To be honest, wouldn't say that people there have a despair, no, not at all, they are not deathly scared.  I would say that in their eyes I see a kind of hopelessness (though, probably, these feelings are close in fact).

In the city where my parents live the picture was absolutely different.
If in Moscow I mostly talk to the people who have seen the world, with those who went to anti-Putin demonstrations with me, with those who doesn't divide people on white and black, straights and gays, believers and atheists, here, in province, the situation is just horrible. I'm here the third day, but I already want to leave from here. I feel very uncomfortable. Every person told me that I am a traitor, "liberal" and the intellectual lousy, and we were friends with these people since my childhood. I try to stop all discussions about Ukraine and Conchita Wurst before they begin, but people just do not stop, and they don't want to listen to me (thanks to social networks they already know my position). I feel that they were waiting for me to say to my face how much they despise me. All together.

I don't know how to survive 10 more days here, it is very sad and uncomfortable, and the worst thing is that no person shares my views or simply stands up for me when the whole crowd is screaming at me. Wherever I go, whoever I meet, whatever we talk, everything comes to the same end: lynching the tolerant me.

I never thought that in my homeland I will feel myself a foreigner.

Ant #264. Friendship...

"Friendship is always a love story. Besides, I even put friendship above love! I have an internal cult of friendship because friendship is disinterested, there is no full possession and there is a space which you concede to another person. For me friendship is the highest form of love, the highest degree of love. That's why it's a love story, of course, with no any self-interest of gender, any sexual manipulation... "

Said by one russian screenwriter and director, the woman that I respect a lot.

Ant #263. Dick.

A funny dialog I've had today with one of my best friends (a girl). She's waiting for me in my homeland.

- Come here [to Russia] and you can fuck someone?
- Fuck? Someone in Russia? Hell, no!
- Why not?
- I'm not into slavic people! Yuk and anti-sexy!
- I'm in depression and you keep killing me.
- Hahaha, it's not about you, I'm just more attracted to argentinians. Come here and you'll see!
- What you mean by that? I'm slavic!
- So am I!
- But you have a dick. Everybody loves a dick!
- Aahahahaha, this is epic! )))
- Say that I'm cool! )
- You're awesome! You're even better than a dick! XD

Just in case... XD

Dick Tracy poster with Madonna )))

Ant #257. Sweet Conchita Wurst.

Another arguing with relatives, and now because of Conchita Wurst.

The russian society turned insane when she won Eurovision. Countless and countless posts and articles about death of Europe, about family values, about tolerance that destroys the world. On the central TV they said that "Europe has a bloody diarrhea" and that "Beard is a sign of loneliness and Apocalypse!" XDDD

And it would have been just funny, if people weren't that serious about this shit.

But what is really funny is people talking about family values in a country which is a world leader in divorces and abortions.

Hypocrites!

Ant #255. 1 year.

I just cannot believe it!
Today is the 1st anniversary of my living in Argentina.

Gosh, 1 year since I arrived to Ezeiza International Airport.
It was the most exciting flight in my entire life, I was brave, full of hopes and happy! I knew what I was doing and what for. I wanted to change my life and I have definitely done it!

So how was this year to me?
Shortly, it was everything!

I got every type of events/emotions/problems that a person can get.
Sometimes it was difficult, sometimes it was fun, sometimes it was bitter, sometimes it was crazy.
Like in a song, "it wasn't always perfect, but it wasn't always bad".

Do I think it was a mistake? I don't know.
Would I rather stay at home if I knew 1 year ago how will it be? Probably yes. Not because I regret of coming here. I just think it was kinda pointless. My life changed in many ways, but not the way I wanted it to change. I lost too much and got almost nothing. But still... I'm enjoying to be here. I love the country (not the government), I like people, I like the weather, I like the situation with tolerance and human rights, I like the food and wine here.

I've learnt some big lessons here:
Expectations -> disappointments.
Life is too short for bullshit.
Trust no bitches. Watch who is really worth your time, your care and your love. Don't waste your emotions, they can run out in any moment.
You can do anything if you believe in yourself. There are no limits!

So... It's time to thank some people.

At first I'd like to thank those amazing people who I've met here. Not calling names, you all know who I'm talking about. Thank you for being with me, for getting my ass to the parties, for calling and texting me when I feel bad, for asking me how am I, for teaching me bad words, for helping me in many ways, for introducing me to other good people. Thank you very much! XoXo

Then I'd like to thank those who left me. Thank you for making me stronger, for helping me to discover my inner power, for explaining me that I'm not that bad, there are much worse people, for teaching me how to separate real friends from fake friends. Thank you very much! XoXo

Also I'd like to thank my family and my friends from my "past life". Thank you for supporting me no matter what, for not forgetting me, for staying in touch through all this year, you are better than gold, better than any diamond in the universe, you're simply the best! Thank you very much and see you all soon! XoXo

And last, but not least I'd like to thank my best friend. Thank you for always being with me, for understanding, for the best advices you give me, for your amazing sense of humor and countless laugh I got with you. I'll never forget the moment we first met almost 5 years ago and all the great experience we had together. Thank you very much! XoXo Dior bless you! )))

Sincerely yours, el ruso.

Ant #250. Danger! High voltage!

I live in a country where everybody touches and kisses. Everybody!!!
Even straight men do that welcoming each other.
>_<

So I try to be nice and do what people are used to do, but every time someone kisses me or even touches me, I feel like I get an electrical shock. Every single piece of my body protests!

Of course, I don't feel so when someone I love is touching me, in this case I feel warm.
But it's really hard to me to accept these intimate (yes, intimate) contacts even from my close friends.

Well, there are always exceptions! No details! ;-)

Ant #248. Time Machine.

If I had a Time Machine, I would travel into the future to see how many people will be upset 

when I die. 

Don't ask me why.

Ant #233. Merry Xmas! Vol. 2.

*  *  *

Ho! Ho! Ho!

I know it's a bit late, but late is better than never!

So as I said, on jan 7 there was Christmas for orthodox christians in Russia, and all my religious friends and my family were celebrating it!

So Merry f*cking Christmas! ^_^ 

*  *  *